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Monday, 11 December 2017

08 : 30

I shed tears...It seemed so hard to let you go.

Your fingers brushed up against mine as i tried to hold on for the last  time.

You've not been gone so long and i already miss how much you glow.

Staring at the pane of the window, my pain is reflected to me in full view.

Who'd tell the story 'bout me and you.

I guess there really was no 'us' without our little feuds.

It's really super crazy how i miss you.

When I'm hanging with my guys, the words rolling down my lips infer that i diss you.

It's a sham...a facade well painted to conceal my weakness.

This love/hate thing, i really got no words to explain.

To put it plainly, I probably hate that I love you dearly.

It's really a strange feeling, like I've been saying...i can only put it barely.

That's why these days I'm having conversations with the beer bottles.

To numb the pain, 'coz I never want to feel dumb again.

To your eyes I brought the rain.

Back when i looked upon you with disdain.

I said to myself, "this is gonna be a smash-grab mission".

"Get in and get out", like a nigga whose got a dope pull out game.

Never did I know that I'd never stay the same.

You came into my life and took over my brain.

You became the warden who directed the traffic of my thoughts.

"Babe who's calling?","who's that nigga that caught you while you were falling".

Trust me, never in my life had i been so over-protective.

Snooping through your phones trying to detect things...I guess you could conclusively say that I became a detective.

That's just to let you know how far I fell.

All the corny shit I did my lips can't even tell.

It's so hard to imagine the one I love the most is not here right now.

In the beginning, who would have thought we'd break our vows.

But here we are, standing on each side with broken promises in our hands.

Not too long ago we kissed as the sun set, feet deep in beach sand.

How did it go south?

I guess no one knows the answer.

Arrrggh!! how I want you back!

How I yearn for your smile, your deep dimples and your radiance that lights up about a mile.

Instead I'm stuck here...I'm soliloquizing.

Wishing I could take back the hands of time...everyday I've been playing that R.kelly's song.

I still percieve your fragrance on my jean jacket you wore on the night of our anniversary.

I never knew I was my own adversary.

Me vs me and I f#cked up.

I don't even wanna put no blame on you...I'm Akon on this...the whole blame's on me...damn! a nigga f#cked up.

I've lost a rare gem, now all these precious stones are worthless to me.

I don't even know what's next.

I still spend my time reading up on your love texts.

I'm that hung on you, it'll be hard to get you out of my system.

Coz these days every girl seems to look like you, talk like you, smile like f#cking MTN, you're everywhere i go.

You're my best connection... to life and everything it symbolizes.

If I say I fit live without you...e mean say I don dey lie since.

All I hope for is that you forgive me my sins, but then, the probability is thin.

Hence this is not a time to man up, I'm letting the tears flow freely.

Forever cursing my mistakes, and the things i should have done ideally.

I curse 'em...I f#cking do!!

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